By Dianna Oles
In traditional Hindu culture, there are four stages of life, called “āśramas” in Sanskrit. They are:
- brahmacarya (student life), which begins upon entering school and typically ends after college;
- gṛhastha (householding), after moving into the workforce and usually marrying and having a family;
- vanaprastha (retiring to the forest), a time to turn attention inward, after retirement from a full-time career and the accumulation of offspring, wealth, a house and possessions; and
- saṃnyāsa (renunciation), the ascetic stage focusing on obtaining selfknowledge through svādhyāya (self-study), reading scriptures and meditation.
The gṛhasthin (householder) makes the other three āśramas possible by supporting them in every way. For example, with many of the basic needs taken care of by the gṛhasthin, the student can focus on her studies, and the vanaprasthin can play more of a supportive role in family affairs. A saṃnyāsin also depends upon support from the gṛhasthin donated either directly to him/her or to the monastery or hermitage he lives in. The gṛhasthin also helps sustain society by volunteering and donating to the poor, arts, education and to
spiritual and charitable causes.
In this way, the gṛhasthin is the sustainer of the whole āśrama system—all four stages of life. He/she is a karma yogi/yoginī who enables everyone to fulfill the duties of their particular life stage: studying, worldly life, retirement or full renunciation. Yet, he/she is not better than the other āśramas. All roles are important and necessary.
How do the yoga practices of the four āśramas differ? The goal of yoga practice is always the same: attaining the knowledge of Brahman/ātman/selfknowledge. However, many of us don’t realize this is the goal and we spend our lives pursuing sensual pleasures, power, wealth, fame and material objects. The following verses from the Kaṭha Upaniṣhad affirm there are two paths of life one can choose: spiritual well-being (śreyas “superior”) or material (preyas “more agreeable”) well-being.
Śreyaśca preyaśca manuṣyametastau
saṃparītya vivinakti dhīraḥ l
Śreyo hi dhīro’bhipreyaso vṛṇīte preyo
mando yogakṣemād vṛṇīte ll 1. 2. 2
The wise person distinguishes between the two paths available to mankind: spiritual or material pursuits. Indeed, he chooses the spiritual path over the material life, but the dull-witted chooses the material path for living in comfort.
While some start to move in the direction of self-knowledge after a tragic loss or near the end of life, others never seek this knowledge. However, a small handful of people seek spiritual wisdom from an early age, such as Srī Shankarācharya, who as a youth took saṃnyāsa vows, or Buddha, who suddenly moved out of his gṛhastha stage directly into the saṃnyāsa stage, though he had a young child, wife and a kingdom to rule yet someday. So strong was their desire for the direct experience of self-knowledge, that they couldn’t give serious time to anything else.
The real difference between saṃnyāsins and gṛhasthins is their focus. One has a singular focus on the pursuit of the knowledge of Brahman, and though the other may also be focused on attaining that knowledge, they have many other concerns or interests that demand their attention, such as their career, partner, children, love, vacations, etc.
In the pursuit of knowledge, we continually prune our unhealthy/limiting tendencies and replace them with more clarity and more wisdom. As we practice to the capacity we are able, we may get small glimpses/hints of knowledge along the way, until one day, we stumble upon truth. It comes all at once. There is no partial knowledge; either you know truth or you do not. Once we know, there is no going back. What then?
Then we go on with our everyday life: we wash the dishes, do laundry, eat our meals, practice, read books, bathe and breathe air. For the householder, there is much to do to keep you grounded. For the ascetic, there is service to the world. For both, there is no longer my house, my child, my possessions, neither mine nor yours. We go on with total dispassion following the roles we are living to the best of our ability, enjoying the experiences of life as we live out our days. Living dispassionately, we do not stop living our life, we simply stop chasing impermanent pleasures and resisting what we find disagreeable. Instead, we invite all to come to the table and are unchanged by who shows up (or not).
Dianna Oles holds an MA in Eastern Philosophy with a concentration in languages and culture. She has been studying yoga, meditation and Ayurveda for 15 years and currently teaches in Chicago.
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